Patti (from Just One More) wrote in a comment that it probably would have been fine to splurge a little yesterday, and part of what makes me so mad about GD is that I am 100% sure she is right. There's no way that a few little sugar spikes could have any serious implications for me or the baby. The greatest risk from GD at this point is an oversized baby and given that I'm still losing weight and the baby is exactly on track to be an average 7.5 lb American baby, I don't think that's such a serious risk. After all, my midwife was fine with me waiting 3 weeks from the diagnosis to my first consult ...
So why am I so obsessive? Because of the awful power dynamic where the doctor who is supposed to be 'helping me manage my condition' is also the doctor who will sign on whether I am 'allowed to go into labor' or have a 'vaginal birth.' It's the worst conflict of interest for me. There are times when I obviously skip drawing my blood because I'm worried it might be high and if I have too many high numbers they'll flag my chart. But of course it would be far better healthwise to know if my blood sugar really did spike then to simply skip the reading, and it would let me make better choices in the future. It also does not help that this is a big GD clinic and I have yet to see the same person twice and nobody seems to remember exactly why I'm there (last time the resident told the doctor with the door wide open that my numbers were so good that I had managed to 'mask' the effects of the disease and should probably just be released. What she meant to say was that I am so obsessive that I had 'controlled' the disease, but the choice of words was pretty telling.) Since the clinic bills my insurance $605 per visit, I really wish I could at least see the same doctor more than once.
After a long discussion with the resident who wanted me released from the 'program' last appointment, I'm pretty sure that I don't actually have GD. What I have is pre-pregnancy pre-diabetes. On one hand, this is good because my numbers have actually improved during pregnancy. Of course, for the long term this is rather bad; it means that I'm well on my way to being a regular ol' diabetic who will have to exercise self-control everyday for the rest of my life starting sooner that I'd planned. But either way, I think I spend more time obsessing over how the clinic will 'judge' my readings and weight gain and the baby's growth then actually thinking about the real health issues. Oh well - this too will pass soon. I think I may put up a survey on exactly how much weight I can expect to gain in the 2 weeks post-partum. While everyone else is marveling at how easily the water weight comes off, I'm fully expecting to pack on the pounds with all my stockpiled desserts ...
If you have time, please click over to Patti's blog - she's having a bit of a rough week.
And while I'm thinking of random blog tidbits, I wanted to respond to a comment from Rachel at Just What I Always Wanted a few days ago (another fellow traveler and commuter). She wrote that she didn't mean to offend me by questioning one of our many crazy decisions, and I just wanted to write that I have yet to be offended by any comment on my blog and I am always so incredibly grateful that people are actually still reading my rants and whining. Thanks guys!
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3 comments:
Thanks, Rachel, for the shout-out. After cleaning my house obsessively this morning, I feel a bit better. Your comment helped tremendously, too!
In Canada there's a big study on that is basically saying that of all the women that take the glucose tolerance test, almost 85% of the diagnoses of GD are false. They've noticed that if you take the test on another day, you could get completely different numbers!
Research is also questioning whether monitoring blood sugar and labelling someone with GD as "high risk" is even necessary.
My midwife, doula and another midwife at the clinic all insist that with one number out of the normal range, I am not diabetic, but rather "glucose intolerant". However, they wanted me to go to the GD clinic to ensure I was taking appropriate care to not become GD. However, according to the GD clinic, there's "no such thing" as Pregnany Induced Glucose Intolerance and I'm just plain diabetic.
I "tested" my GD this weekend by eating a normal diabetic friendly meal and then following it up with a bowl FULL of milk chocolate chips. Two hours later my blood sugar level was 6.1 mmol (the max they want you to be is 6.8).
I asked my midwife if I could possibly be diabetic with those kinds of numbers. She said no way. So why is the GD clinic insisting on labelling me?
As a friend of mine said, "When you're a hammer, everything looks like a nail."
Maybe you'll come out of this just fine. You never know. Pregnancy has some pretty funky effects on the body and you're clearly managing your blood sugar very well. Hopefully, it'll all go away and you won't have to worry about missing the good stuff *ever* again.
As for gaining weight after the baby is born... I'll be right beside you on that. I already look at yummy stuff and say, "Just wait till this kid is born. I'm gonna eat!"
LOL
I've NEVER thought you were whining!
My glucose numbers were suspect before I got pregnant so I've tried to be very careful about watching what I eat (which, BTW, was so difficult when I was super sick and I completely identified with your post about wanting everything you're not supposed to have). I've also done a lot of reading--internet AND real books--and I've seen the same research Patti mentioned. Additionally, I question the test itself; no one fasts and then drinks pure sugar while sitting around (and, for me, I worry about whether or not the technician is going to be able to get enough blood from the first draw or if they'll have to stick me again).
All that being said, I completely understand why you aren't very keen to "cheat." You've kept such a great attitude throughout your pregnancy. Only a few more weeks to go!
I better work on getting more offensive.
Unlike the above, I know jack about GD. But probably not having it is good? But wtf with them not being able to figure it out and manage your care better?
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