Yes, she did

At dinner my great-aunt somehow told a story about a friend's granddaughter who couldn't get pregnant, did IVF, and lo and behold had a 'surprise #2.' (No, she doesn't know about either my or my sister's infertile adventures as far as I know). Not a problem. She's older, she doesn't know her audience, she was just chatting.

But then my sister chimes in that she knows lots of people who get pregnant after IF treatments. Honestly.

And I bit my tongue at the dinner table.

But let me tell you I had some words for her on the drive home. Just plain, reasonable words. I.e. some people have serious diagnosis that make the chance of conception null (let's see: blocked tubes, blocked sperm ... um, what was that they said about me ... people who have been anovulatory for over 15 years shouldn't hold out hope for a miraculous little egg to suddenly appear ... something like that). Yes, many people are 'subfertile' and given years of patience they just might just strike it lucky - say 5%? That's not a lot according to the O.E.D. And most of those are using fertility treatments because of the ticking time bomb. People who are diagnosed as infertile at age 11 usually don't just, um, recover.

And what did she do? She said she definitely, personally knew plenty of people who had got pregnant after infertility (now, she has 2 good friends with babies so I'm not sure exactly who these people are. She also doesn't work in an office or someplace she would have a lot of casual acquaintances to gossip about. Beats me who these people are).

And I glowered and told her she was an idiot. So much for self-control and behaving like a doormat.

I also assured her that JD and I have already budgeted for future treatments. And that realistically we need to set aside something like $1000 per month in order to be able to go into it with the same attitude as before - i.e. we're doing this till the bitter end, no pause to save money, loans accepted. Because after all she had all of her treatments covered 100% by her husband's insurance and she has no idea why this idea that we should just relax and wait a few years is so completely and totally infuriating.